His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
