I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
They took my balls.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
