the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
