Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
