It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
