I cockslap morals
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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