he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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