That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
