So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
