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worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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