your thong is hanging out like whoa
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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