I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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