i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
