He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
