i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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