More tranny stories later!
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
