dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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