So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize