Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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