Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
