He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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