it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Randomize