We're like a lot better than the average bears
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Bring me that man meat
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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