dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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