My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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