One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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