You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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