there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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