I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
