It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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