Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
