Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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