just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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