No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
