He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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