I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
