lets start a swedish sibling band together
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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