What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
