I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
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