We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
