Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
