their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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