The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize