I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
