quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
