Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize