I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
