I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
