Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
