I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She made me pour olive oil on her.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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